After falling for a charming suitor, a Montana woman learned the hard way that love can’t always be trusted.
In a classic romance scam, Rita lost over $90,000 to a man posing as a celebrity. She felt emotionally connected to him since he claimed to be going through a divorce just as she was.
“It hit me at the right time. I was very vulnerable at that time,” said Rita, who requested to be identified only by her first name in a public service announcement released by the FBI.
The initial communications were via a social media platform until the “celebrity” asked to move their conversations to an anonymous messaging platform.
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“These texts were like a drug,” Rita said “I wasn’t thinking with my brain, I was thinking with my heart.”
After gaining her trust, the scammer started asking Rita for money, and he wanted to be paid in Bitcoin. “It was always through Bitcoin,” she said. “The money is ok. I lost about $90,000 which is a big chunk. However, the biggest part is to lose your heart and your soul and that is a big part and that takes a long time to get back.”
It took Rita, who was 66 at the time, about 4½ months to realize she was the victim of a romance scam, a common type of confidence scheme that uses the pretense of a romantic or intimate relationship to manipulate or defraud the victim.
She shared her story in the hope that others learn from it. “If I can save just one person from this folly, if I can make one person realize that this is not real, I’ve done my job,” she said.
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Confidence and romance scams have resulted in the greatest amount of financial losses compared to other crimes committed using the internet. More than 7,600 victims older than 60 lost a total of about $389 million in 2024, according to the FBI’s Internet Crime Report.
In a romance scam, a con artist creates a fake online persona to win your heart and trust. They’ll shower you with affection and build an intense connection, maybe even talking about marriage or a future together.
But it’s just a story. The scammer will come up with endless excuses to avoid meeting in person, and eventually the conversation will turn to money. They might claim to have a medical emergency, an unexpected legal fee or a business deal gone wrong.
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But if you’re diligent, you can protect yourself from becoming a victim:
- Don’t share too much online. Scammers use the personal details you reveal, such as where you work, places you visit or the names of pets, to build a fake identity that appeals to you.
- Pay attention to how someone you’ve met online acts. If they seem too good to be true or ask you to move your conversation off a dating app, take it as a sign you should slow down.
- Watch for excuses. If they keep saying they want to meet up but always have a last-minute excuse for not being able to make it, they’re probably not legitimate.
- The biggest red flag is if they ask for money. No matter how convincing their story is, never send money to anyone you’ve met online.
If you suspect you’ve been the target of a romance scam, the best thing you can do is stop all contact with the scammer and report the incident to the FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center at www.ic3.gov.
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