‘Don’t Worry About This Loan,’ Parents Said — $221K-A-Year Caller Now Stuck With $104K As ‘Ramsey Host’ Says, ‘That’s Not Fair To You’
- Personal Finance
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- 6 minutes read
A college promise made years ago is now driving a financial and family standoff.
John, a Chicago-based father of four, told “The Ramsey Show” that his parents took out a $104,000 Parent Loan for Undergraduate Students when he was 18. He said the loan was never meant to be his responsibility until expectations shifted after his father’s death.
“Don’t worry about this loan,” John said his parents told him while encouraging him to live on campus and get the full college experience. Now 34 and married, with a combined household income of $221,000 a year, he said he is being asked to repay the entire balance himself.
“That’s not fair to you,” co-host Rachel Cruze said.
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A Promise That Shaped His Financial Path
John said the understanding around the loan influenced how he planned his adult life. After his father became ill and could no longer work, he began making payments even though repayment had never been part of the original understanding.
“I felt obligated. Kind of guilty,” John said when personal finance expert Dave Ramsey asked why he started paying.
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When The Burden Became Uneven
Later, John learned the loan had been consolidated without his knowledge. During a call with his mother and sister, he realized that payments he had been making were briefly applied to his sister’s student debt.
He said he ended up paying nearly $2,000 toward her loans before discovering the issue. His sister now lives with their mother and is not paying her own student debt, he said.
John said he had gone along with the arrangement for years, saying he had become a “doormat.”
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Choosing Boundaries Over Silence
Ramsey outlined two options: continue paying without complaint or stop and set a firm boundary. John said continuing was no longer realistic after he and his wife paid off more than $120,000 of their own debt and committed to shared financial goals.
John said his main concern was the potential impact on his relationship with his mother and the possibility that his children would not have a relationship with their grandmother.
“When you set a boundary with boundaryless people, 100% of the time they go cray cray,” Ramsey said.
For John, sorting through the loan also means balancing family pressure with the financial future he and his wife are building. Domain Money provides personalized, CFP professional-led financial planning for professionals earning $100,000 or more a year who want tailored, expert guidance through decisions like these.
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