I Quit My Job to Be a Stay-at-Home Mom — Now I’m Draining My Savings

Before having children, I worked as a journalist for years. I loved my job, and after my daughter was born in 2021, I returned to work full time at a magazine.

My monthly salary just covered her childcare fees with little left over. This meant my husband had to cover all other living expenses, with only tiny contributions from me.

When we had our second baby, a son in 2023, something had to change. I couldn’t afford childcare for both kids on my measly salary. I was losing money each month.

I became so stressed about finances that I’d cry or snap at my husband. I wanted to continue in journalism, but it didn’t seem to be financially viable.

That’s when I knew something had to change.

I decided I needed to quit my full-time job

I had always wanted to be a journalist because I loved hearing and writing stories. It was my dream job.

But the stress of trying to make it work financially, my desire to spend time with my children as they grew, and our decision not to put two children into childcare five days a week all pointed to one solution: I had to quit the magazine.

To still have a semblance of a career, I started freelancing on the side while also being a stay-at-home mother. It seemed like the best of both worlds. I would make some money, keep my writing going, and build a base of contacts for when I could one day return full time.

There are months I don’t get any income as a freelancer

Eventually, both my kids went to day care three days a week, meaning I could work on freelance projects Tuesday to Thursday.

Immediately, I loved my working days and still do; I treasure the chance to speak to people about their lives.

More importantly, it gave me the flexibility needed to be able to drop everything if a child was (inevitably) sick — which was more necessary in the early days but still important now.

However, my income flows in irregular peaks and troughs. While freelancing suits all aspects of my life, I often receive payments weeks after publication, which makes it difficult for me to budget effectively. There are some months when I make no money at all.

Children are little money pits

I want my kids to have enriching experiences, but those often come at a high cost.

I pay for swimming lessons for both my kids (a combined $115 a month) and dance and drama for my daughter.

I’ve even paid for a horseback riding lesson for her because I remember the joy learning to ride brought me as a kid. She loved it, but I couldn’t justify spending $72 for one 30-minute session. Riding will have to come later, at the expense of something else, or if I hit the jackpot.

Each month, I breathe a sigh of relief when I realize I’ve earned enough to cover their activities for the following week.

My husband covers so much that I don’t want to ask him for more. I know he’s under enough financial stress as it is.

As a result, my own savings have taken a hit

With the ebbs and flows of my pay, I sometimes earn so little, particularly after paying for the children’s clubs, that I’m forced to raid my savings account.

I’ve been building up my savings since I was 18, so it’s sometimes hard to watch the account drain rapidly. However, spending money on my children is so important to me that I don’t begrudge them.

My draining savings and my children’s needs add incentive to work harder. I am constantly on the lookout for stories, developing my own ideas, or trying to establish new contacts. While I might be embarrassed to continue pushing on my own behalf, thinking about being able to afford the children’s activities gives me the motivation to keep going.

At some point, I won’t be paying for the children anymore; they’ll be standing on their own two feet. I sometimes look forward to those days.

But every time I see my kids smiling, I know I’m making the right choices.