A recent college graduate shared a painful reality in a Reddit post that quickly got attention: the moment he walked off the graduation stage, his parents stopped helping him and started demanding rent. Not just rent, either, they now expect him to hand over a big chunk of his paycheck. And he’s not even in a full-time job yet.
From Graduation To Guilt Trips
“It feels so messed up,” he wrote. “My parents basically stopped helping overnight and started keeping score. Now they want rent even though I’m living at home, I’m paying for my own food and basics, and on top of that they expect me to hand over a big chunk of my paycheck. Their line is that they raised me, so I ‘owe’ them. Has anyone dealt with parents treating you like an ATM?”
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Many in the thread were furious on the graduate’s behalf.
“You don’t owe your parents for raising you,” one commenter said. “They chose to have sex and make a baby.”
Others echoed the sentiment that raising a child is a choice and responsibility, not a debt to be collected later.
Despite working a job to stay afloat and save up to move out, the grad says his money is constantly drained. He’s resorted to extreme measures to cut costs, even using his parents’ supplies in secret.
“Sometimes I’ll quietly use a little of my parents’ stuff when they are not looking because I’m that broke right now,” he admitted. “Toothpaste, toilet paper, and laundry detergent.”
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While some commenters said asking for modest rent from an adult child is reasonable, the consensus was that demanding large sums under the justification that he “owes” them for being raised crosses a line.
“That is a control tactic,” one person wrote. “What they’re doing is trapping you from saving money to leave,” another added. “Too many people have kids as a retirement plan or extra wallets to dip into.”
A Common Story, A Divided Crowd
Many shared their own experiences with similar situations. Some were forced to pay rent as teens, others found out years later their parents had saved up the money to give back later. But plenty recounted financial abuse, control, and resentment.
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“I’m 52 and my father still says I ‘owe’ him money for the expenses of the first 18 years of my life,” one person shared. “When my husband and I finally got a house, he only called to say that he sees we paid for it with ‘his’ money that I still ‘owe’, and demanded his name be added to it.”
Some urged the original poster to hide savings in a separate bank account and not disclose his income. “Make sure they have zero access to your bank account,” one said.
Others pushed back. A few commenters argued that expecting some contribution from an adult child is fair, especially if they’re living rent-free. One pointed out, “If you’re living in their house and are now out of college and working, you should be kicking in toward rent.”
But most drew a hard line between reasonable rent and demanding money as payback for parenting.
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