At 40, most people are looking for stability. John, calling into “The Ramsey Show,” was looking for a lifeline.
“I’ve struggled to keep steady employment over the past decade,” he began. Not exactly a soft open. He’s been fired 14 times in 11 years — “not even a year each,” Ramsey pointed out — and the reasons aren’t vague: “behavioral and personality challenges,” he said.
With over $70,000 in federal student loans looming and no job prospects, John is torn between two wildly different ideas: joining the Navy as an officer or starting a podcast. One option screams discipline, chain of command, and federally subsidized structure. The other, well, screams into a microphone.
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“I’d like to be independent,” John said. But employers aren’t calling. Not even for the low-wage starter jobs Ramsey usually recommends. That’s when the host, clearly surprised, asked for the full count. Fourteen jobs in 11 years? “That’s not even a year each,” Ramsey replied flatly.
John’s story spiraled deeper. He revealed he has a personality disability — narcissistic personality disorder, diagnosed through years of neurological assessments. “There’s no cure for it,” he said. “According to research, it’s due to low gray matter in the brain.”
Ramsey tried to steer the conversation toward functionality. “What you describe would be normally I would think belligerence,” he said, when John admitted the challenges manifest as defiance toward authority. John agreed, explaining he often enters jobs with bitterness and ends up self-sabotaging early on. Even when employers don’t know his track record, he says they can sense it. “It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.”
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The Navy dream didn’t go over well. “The Navy doesn’t do well with people who have trouble with authority,” Ramsey said bluntly. “That’s going to be a nasty conflict.” Rachel Cruze, Ramsey’s co-host and daughter, echoed the concern. This wasn’t about finding a job. It was about healing.
“I think that’s what I’m wondering,” Ramsey said, “Is there…therapy or something that helps you hold a job, or have a quality relationship?”
John’s attempt to inject hope — proposing nanobots to fix brain chemistry — lost Ramsey entirely. “You just left me behind at the airport, dude,” he said.
There was one glimmer: John has been given some tools through therapy. But he admitted to bringing “bitterness from previous jobs” into new ones. “That’s logical,” Ramsey replied. But logic wasn’t enough.
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Ramsey finally admitted he was out of his depth. “This is above Rachel and my pay grade,” he said, offering to connect John with John Delony, another Ramsey personality who specializes in mental health. “Maybe he can add something intelligent to this conversation because I can’t.”
Before wrapping, Cruze added one final thought. “People do have serious setbacks, but they overcome them — and we talk to them on this show all the time.” It wasn’t dismissive. It was a challenge. The takeaway: personality disorders, trauma, and job loss don’t have to define a life — but they will, unless someone finds the tools to fight back.
And as for the podcast? Ramsey didn’t even touch that one. But if John really wants independence, he might want to start with therapy — before a mic or a military recruiter.
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