If you’ve ever dropped your kid off at daycare and wondered whether it’d be cheaper to buy a second house instead, you’re not alone. One parent on Reddit’s r/MiddleClass subreddit said they’ve officially hit that breaking point.
“We pay $1,480 a month for daycare. Our mortgage is $1,350,” they wrote. “It’s wild to me that taking care of one toddler costs more than housing an entire family. We make a decent income, but between childcare, groceries, gas, and insurance, there’s nothing left at the end of the month. Every time I hear someone say ‘just save more,’ I want to hand them our budget and ask what part they think is optional. It feels like the middle class is being slowly priced out of existing.”
They ended with a line that could double as the motto for modern parenthood: “I genuinely don’t know how people do it.”
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That post hit home for plenty of other exhausted middle class parents who say they’re working harder than ever yet somehow falling behind.
One parent said, “We spaced our kids out by four years just because of daycare costs. It’s like we’re not planning a family—we’re planning around an invoice.” Another admitted, “I used to think daycare would free me up to work. Turns out, I’m just working to afford daycare.”
Several pointed out that the original poster’s $1,350 mortgage was practically a luxury. “I’d kill for that,” one user wrote. “Our mortgage is over $3,000 and daycare is $2,000 a month. You can’t win.”
Others joined in to talk about how warped the math has become. One commenter said they pay $2,300 per child in daycare while still carrying a $3,600 mortgage, even with a 3% pandemic-era interest rate. Another said their rent alone is $1,000 more than the original poster’s mortgage—yet daycare still eats what’s left.
One person who works at a university said they pay “the equivalent of three college tuitions” just to keep two young kids in daycare. “It’s not even fancy,” they added. “It’s just the only place with openings.” Another confessed they were on a waitlist for months before finally landing a spot, only to realize they couldn’t afford it without cutting back on groceries and car maintenance.
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A few turned their frustration toward the industry itself. “The worst part,” one user said, “is those big-name daycare chains charging tuition-level rates while paying workers $12 an hour.” Another described their neighbor, a daycare franchise owner who “drives a Ferrari on weekends and brags about hiring unqualified staff to save money.”
And then came the bigger picture replies—the ones that turned frustration into something closer to dread. “Middle class is absolutely under attack,” one person wrote. “Everything costs more, but wages haven’t moved. We’re the people who make too much for help and not enough to breathe.” Another added, “Instead of fighting for affordable childcare, they’ve got us fighting each other about who has it worse.”
The replies read like a chorus of parents who love their kids but are exhausted financially. One said, “We’re not even living anymore. We’re existing between paychecks.” Another wrote, “It’s like they want us to feel guilty for struggling.”
Their outrage isn’t misplaced.
Analysis conducted by the Economic Policy Institute found that daycare now costs more than in-state college tuition in 38 states and Washington, D.C.
Child Care Aware of America reports the national average price for full-time child care at $13,128 per year for one child. In pricier states like Washington, that number climbs past $21,000. For two children — one toddler and one infant — the annual cost jumps to $28,168, based on the group’s latest data. That’s about 35% of the median U.S. household income, according to 2024 Census figures.
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And even in states with higher wages, the math doesn’t get easier. In Massachusetts, parents pay roughly $47,012 a year for two kids, eating up 44% of the state’s median household income.
That kind of pressure isn’t just stressful—it’s redefining what “middle class” even means. A generation ago, that label implied security: a house, a steady job, maybe a family vacation if you budgeted right. Now, it’s a juggling act where parents debate which bill they can postpone or whether having a second child is financially suicidal.
One Reddit user summed it up in a way that felt equal parts bitter and true: “We used to say the American dream was owning a home and raising a family. Now it’s just trying to survive both.”
No one in the thread pretended to have a fix. Some said they’d gone down to one income just to stop the bleeding. Others said they’re counting the days until their child starts kindergarten so they can finally breathe again. “It’s not that we’re bad with money,” one parent wrote. “It’s that the math doesn’t work anymore.”
Image: Shutterstock
When the price of daycare is higher than your mortgage, and your reward for staying in the workforce is barely breaking even, there’s only one question left to ask: How do people do it?
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